Jimn Kyles

Unstuck & Unstoppable

028: The Untold Secret to Self Discipline and Personal Motivation

If you are struggling with motivation and discipline, then you are listening to and watching the right episode today. There are tons of people right now that seem to have no discipline. Is it really a lack of discipline or could it be a lack of vision?

Today, we will share with you the three things that will help you understand and gain mastery of vision so you continue to move your life forward.

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Jimn Kyles 0:00
Welcome to the unstuck and unstoppable podcast where we help you move your life forward. If you are struggling with motivation and discipline you are listening to and watching the right episode of our podcast today. My name is Jimn kyles. I’m here with your host, Jolea Garza. Garza. Hey, Joe, how you doing? I’m doing great. I’m so excited to be here. Yeah. Well, it’s so good. We’re grateful today. We got a great topic. Yeah. Come on, where we’re talking about vision, vision vision. Yep. So if you’re brand new to the podcast, we want to welcome you. Thank you for tuning in. Today, we’re going to be talking about something that I had the idea about from a quote that I heard the other day I actually it was so profound, I wrote it down. It’s on my mirror. In my bathroom, which is funny. I actually write little notes on my bathroom. But the whole quote is, discipline remains dormant in the absence of a dream. Wow, come on. That’s great. Rory Vaden wrote that and I thought, Man discipline remains dormant in the absence of a dream in the absence of vision in the absence of something greater right, than what I’m living for right now. And I don’t know about you, but there are tons of people right now that seem on the outside, like, Hey, I just don’t have no discipline. Yeah. But what I’ve been pondering is, I wonder if it’s a lack of discipline, or if it’s a lack of vision, that’s great. And it’s so funny, because when we talked about talking about vision, I said, Hey, I was just talking to some leaders. Yes. And we were just talking about vision as well. So I think this topic is so timely. Oh, absolutely. Well, and we’ve talked about this in the past before Episode 13, and 14, I think this one will be episode 28. But you go back and you can listen to or watch it on YouTube. But we actually talked about moving your life forward revision. And really, in that those two episodes, I talk about what vision is and how to create a vision. But what I recognized is there’s a little bit of a gap between having a vision and refining a vision that is compelling and motivates you and is inspiring to your life. So true. So I think today, that’s what I really want to talk about is, Hey, what is it that is motivating you that is moving your life forward, because we recognize so many people end up getting stuck in life. And our goal, the whole point of this podcast is to help you move your life forward. Yeah. And speaking of which, I’m so grateful for those of you that have purchased my new book. It’s out it’s an Amazon, it actually hit Amazon’s number one new book and how five different categories there were confetti.

Jimn Kyles 2:38
So thank you to everybody who listens. And if you went and bought a book, or you know if you’re buying it or giving them as Christmas gifts, or whatever, thank you for that. And, you know, so many great reviews already. But the whole point of the book and the podcast is we want to help you move your life forward. And we just believe one of the main building blocks of life I talked about this in the book is actually vision where there’s actually four bits of the building blocks of life, but to talk about the four main building blocks of life that if you’ll identify, work on Discover, build, you’re not only going to get unstuck, but you’re actually going to be unstoppable. Exactly. And so the first one being identity who you are in Christ. Second one is purpose. You know what I’m supposed to be doing right now, my assignment. Third one is vision. That’s what we’re going to talk about today. And then the fourth one is paradigm. And I love that one actually thought the whole book was going to be about prayer, right. But actually, I spoke this last weekend at a place and I was talking about the book and I wrote a brand new session called breaking the cycle of self sabotage. And so yeah, in that powerful

Jimn Kyles 3:46
like, no one’s perfect. But today, you and I have been talking about and it’s like there’s something about this vision that we want to help you create a life where there is something propelling you forward. You know, I love what John Maxwell says he said some a long time ago and Joe you and I get the privilege of pastoring this great church and great staff. But he said something that I love he said I stopped trying to motivate people. And you know what I’m gonna said next. Yeah. started hiring people that were motivated about it. Yeah. And I think it’s the same thing with discipline what we have to be careful of is saying someone is undisciplined or or here’s the sabotage right I’m undisciplined. Right. I can’t seem to find discipline in my life. What is it that you’re not disciplined? Or is it that you don’t have a vision, or a dream that compels you to do things that you’re not doing? Right? So it sounds like discipline is is the result but it’s not the route? That’s right symptom, right. It’s a behavior thing. Yeah. It’s the external its behavior. But when you got a dream when you got a vision, you got something living on the inside of you. Yeah, you can’t. You’re on unstoppable. And that is the point, right? You know, I’m concerned because what we’re taught is, and it was very fascinating you and I’ve talked about this is Marks and Spencer did a study where 3000 people were surveyed. And they were asked about their lives and 96% of those 3000 people surveyed. Were living life on autopilot. Wow. So imagine that. I mean, think about it. Here’s the imagery that I love imagery and visions and thoughts and where I can make it. But imagine sitting in the driver’s seat of a car, that you’re not driving, but you’re simply looking out the window as a passenger. Yeah. It’s not supposed to be that way. Right? So good. You know, cars are not supposed to drive themselves, you’re supposed to be driving that car. And so here we are in the past in the driver’s seat of our lives, acting as if we’re passengers, right. So in other words, you’re reacting to the environment of your life, instead of being the one directing your life. Yeah. And that’s where I think vision is so important. You know, you got to have so let’s talk about that briefly. And then there’s three things that we want to talk about to help you really grab a hold of, and put some handles on the vision that you might have, or the vision that you create in your life. So first thing is that vision comes from God. So we have to know that right? Yeah. So that’s so good, because I think we talk about a lot about purpose, and then vision, and and so all of that, and your identity, all of our nation, the foundation has to come from God, I think there’s something so different about saying, I know who I am, because of me, or I know what my vision is, because I have versus this is my god given Oh, that’s so good. And it turns from from just an idea or a goal into your destiny. That’s God given vision is determined destiny was one of the things that talked about, I think it’s chapter four, it’s living the life without regrets in my book. But I talk about how there’s a lady who interviews people that are in the last few weeks of their life, they’re dying. And it’s their five biggest regrets that continue to come up person after person. And one of them was living a life for other people. So in other words, their their ladder that they climb their entire life was leaning against the wrong building. Right? So vision is the ability to see beyond your present reality into the reality that God has for you. Yeah, so that’s the key, right? It’s not just what my parents want me to do. It’s not even necessarily what you what I want to do. You know, I love the passage in Jeremiah, it says, The heart is deceitful above all else. So it’s like, I don’t even know. Yeah, exactly. And I think, you know, if God doesn’t define your vision for you, somebody else will, a lot of times, it’s not you. But it’s every single deposit that’s been made from the people around you and the standards of, of what society has told you what culture has told you about what you’re made to accomplish. And I love that illustration about leaning your ladder up against the wrong wall, climbing and getting to the top and realizing that you were on is on the wrong building. That’s what we don’t want. We don’t want you to last part of our life, we want to evaluate it now. And even the vision in the discipline of it, and love for an example, if someone says, Hey, man, I just I don’t know what to do with my finances. And you know, I’m undisciplined in the way I spend the truth is, you probably are because you don’t have a vision for what God has for you. Right. So it’s on the words, you may be drowning in debt. Yes. It’s very hard to be disciplined and not spend the money you don’t already have. In fact, statistics show Americans spend more.

Jimn Kyles 8:47
And so you don’t have God’s vision for your life to be debt free. Because it’s the vision of debt freedom that comes based out of God’s word that then gives you the discipline to say no, on Black Friday.

Jolea Garza 9:00
That’s great, man.

Jimn Kyles 9:03
When I’m going through,

Jolea Garza 9:04
yeah, belay, I’m sorry. Yeah,

Jimn Kyles 9:09
but it’s so when someone says I just don’t have the discipline to say no, I would be on the other side of saying, I don’t know if it’s that you’re because if you always attack what you don’t have, you’ll never focus on what you need to overcome that deficit. And the truth is, you don’t need to focus on trying to get more discipline, you need to focus on building a godly vision.

Jolea Garza 9:29
So I guess the big question is how that’s all for the people that are listening. I’m sure they’re wondering, well, how do I get God’s vision, you know, with lightning? You know, meet me in a dream. What how do I hear from God and know what his vision is? For my life? That

Jimn Kyles 9:45
is a fantastic question. If you don’t know how to get God’s vision for life, the first thing you got to do is go to the instruction manual. And that’s the word of God. And so if you need a vision for your marriage, you got to go into the Word of God and find what he says about what a great God life giving marriage looks like financially. He says don’t owe anyone anything except for the debt to love them. Yeah, the debtor becomes the slave. Wow. Yeah. So these are the kinds of scriptures you’ve got to embrace. And then from there, okay, I recognize that as a borrower, I am a slave to the lender, Well, God doesn’t want that he wants me to be debt free. So then you build a framework of what that vision is based on God’s word, because it’s great to get it out of prayer. But God always confirms what you got through His Word. So look at your marriage, look at your family, look at your spiritual life. Look at your physical life. Every area of our life is reflected in the Word of God. So we got to go say, God, how did you design for me to live this life, get his word, and then from there begin to build the vision that God has for you based on what you’ve read in His Word. And that’s, it sounds very simple. And it is. But it’s not easy. Oh, yeah, it’s simple, but complex, because it takes time it takes focus, studying,

Jolea Garza 11:02
praying, and really asking God, and allowing him sometimes to build piece by piece, you know, and I think that’s why I love the four building blocks, because it is you have to uncover your identity, right? You have to know what your purpose is. And we know what your purpose is. And the vision is what gives you the tools to actually get to the purpose. Love just takes a lot of peeling back a lot of studying a lot of praying a lot of time.

Jimn Kyles 11:26
Yeah, what and then once you get that picture, being able to really visualize what it is it’ll begin to motivate you. It’ll scare you. It was funny, Phyllis, and I, you know, we’ve been married for 22 years. And I can talk about finances all day long. That doesn’t motivate her what motivates her is, hey, what’s the future look

Jolea Garza 11:43
like? Right?

Jimn Kyles 11:44
So when I talked about being financially set as a retired couple, when I talk about having a vacation home, on the beach? Well, now she got a vision for that. She’s like, Hey, I’m on a jet. She’s like, I’ll say no to this. For the future of what could be. It’s great. And I just often look at that and say, Man, that’s what it took for us to get more discipline, our finances was having a dream slash vision for what we’re going to spend our life in. And so where is it that you don’t have the discipline? Well, you probably don’t have vision. I love that. So how do I get it? That’s how you get it, you get in God’s Word, you get it through prayer. And then you begin to draw all the dots or connect all the dots and write it out. You need to write your own compelling vision statement. Yeah, like what is your marriage look like? What would you know, a bright marriage, a happy marriage look like it’s gonna look different from different people, right? It’ll have the same nuts and bolts, but the odds and ends the things that inspire you may be different than what inspires someone else.

Jolea Garza 12:41
And I love that. And you know, we’re talking about writing it out. But there’s such importance to that. And I don’t know, if the it’s safe to say the vision, make it plain, or write it out, make it plain. It’s so important, because once you can see it, you can you can accomplish it, accomplish

Jimn Kyles 12:56
it, but just gotta be written down. That’s, that’s absolutely. And here’s three things that I want to focus on. And what I thought about, somebody might have a vision, they may have wrote it down, but they feel like it’s fallen flat. And if that’s the case, here’s three things to help breathe new life, clarity, passion and energy into your vision. The first one is, you need to make sure that your vision is clear.

Jolea Garza 13:20
Yes, clear? Yes. I love that. So much.

Jimn Kyles 13:25
We have a saying is sometimes I’ll say something. And when I say it, someone I can see the confusion or the look on their eyes. You ever said

Jolea Garza 13:34
You’re like the fog? Well,

Jimn Kyles 13:36
I’ll say so that must have been clear as mud. Yeah. So in other words, I was saying it, but it sounded clearer in my head than when I articulated it. I think that’s how some people like some people will say, Well, my vision is to have a better marriage. What is better look like? Right? You know, does that mean instead of arguing twice a week, we’ll argue it’s yeah, you know, design it define it? Yes. So I always look at Vision clarity as like a lens that you would focus on a camera, the old school cam, not iPhones, iPhones, you just push it and it kind of focuses. But the old ones, you remember how used to have to turn the lens and it if you got binoculars, you kind of have to turn the little focus knob, right. That’s the way vision is, you’ll know the vision is clear. When you feel inspired.

Jolea Garza 14:26
That’s great. But I think too, you know, as you’re writing it down, I love that example. It’s like, hey, I want to have a better marriage. We used to do this thing with a group of people. And it’s a great counseling tool to is like tell us how you’re feeling without using pizza words. So if you can define pizza by that word, then you can’t use it. So hey, that pizzas Great. Can’t say I want a great marriage or I want a better marriage. Right? You have to start asking questions. What does a better marriage looks like? And then just like you asked, you know, how many times do we have hard conversations in a week? What will we look like a few years So now and so the more you can define it, the better.

Jimn Kyles 15:03
Yeah. Well even like, joyful conversations, right? You know, you got to really define what what is it that makes you come alive. And then the same for the other spouse for the for your spouse. And then together, you write a vision statement, you’re going to begin to see how you’ll have new discipline to work on a marriage because you got a picture for that marriage is going right. So clarity, whether it’s your marriage, whether it’s finances, whether it’s your physical health, your vision has to be clear. The second thing is, it’s got to be compelling. Yes. So in other words, I want to drop what I’m doing and join, whatever today is, I can get through the pain of today, because tomorrow, it’s

Jolea Garza 15:44
gonna be good, it’s gonna be it should inspire you. I just don’t I don’t know about you. But when you have a good vision, you just feel it in your bones, in your bones, not be a part of it, you cannot jump in and go out and

Jimn Kyles 15:57
move. Well, and that’s the beauty of how God designed it. Like he knew that we would be in a day of pain, listen, all purpose, and I talked about this, often you’ll hear me, you know, we wish that all purpose was joyful and coming alive. And there’s a lot of people even today the great resignation, through this pandemic. It’s like, Well, I’m not working in a place that I don’t enjoy. And I agree with some of it, right? Like I get it if you’re in a toxic environment, nobody wants to work, right? But But I can tell you, I’m 45 years young. Not every job God had me in did I fully enjoy every moment of. And so if you are convinced that God’s number one is for you to be happy, you’re going to miss God’s assignment for now. And the thing that gets us through the pain of now is the vision that God gives us for the future. Yeah, so and that’s why it has to be a compelling like God gives us joy in seeing what tomorrow may bring. When David was in the field, God said, You’re a king. And that got him through the garden through the years of watching his father’s sheep doing the mud, helping his brother developing the character fighting off the animals. But you don’t just get to go from field to palace. There’s a journey,

Jolea Garza 17:11
right? I think about I even think about my little my seven year old Chandler, and whenever we go to the dentist, right, but the funny thing is, Chandler will go to the dentist, because Chandler knows that at the end of the dentist, there is this big ol treasure chests in that treasure chests are some like, good. Yeah, they have good toys at his dentist office. And so it’s the same thing when you know what’s on the other end. And maybe some of the hard times some of the battles some of the trials, you’ll go you’ll, you’ll get through it, knowing that there’s great things on the other side.

Jimn Kyles 17:44
Exactly. Right. So it’s compelling. So a great vision is clear. It’s compelling. And then here’s the last thing, great vision has to be consistent, right? So let me say like this, the vision for tomorrow can’t keep changing tomorrow. You know, like today, it’s this and tomorrow. It’s another day and the next day, it’s another thing and it’s no, no, it’s got to be consistent, like, so whatever your vision is, like, let it be the vision of your life. Now. It’s great. You and I talked about this and the goal doesn’t change, but the strategy may change. So the vision is the same. But how I get there may change but I’m not going to change the vision of a healthy marriage. Like for now. It may look like this in this season. Because marriage when you got young kids different Yes. In marriage with teenagers Exactly. Or marriage as an empty nester. Right. But the vision never change never changes. Yeah. And if you don’t have a vision that you believe can be consistent, then you’re probably not living out the real or pursuing the right vision, right.

Jolea Garza 18:48
And so for a great example, so in marriage, it’s like, hey, when my kids are little, the vision is I want to have a healthy, strong marriage where we’re communicating and spending time with each other consistently. So when you got little kids, that might be a once a month, date night, and then it adjusts when you’re an empty nester that’s like every week, or every night we’re having date night or whatever that looks like. And so the vision is the same, but how you get your vision might change in different CS

Jimn Kyles 19:13
100%. So we’ve got to be consistent in the vision that we’re pursuing. Otherwise, you really become schizophrenic, right? Like, man, I’m pursuing this one day. Have you ever met someone? It’s like, hey, they got this big idea this day, they got this big idea and other day, and what that’s not really

Jolea Garza 19:29
have you met like a serial goalsetter you’re like, Hey, how you doing? It’s like, great. I’m doing this, this and this, and you meet them next month. And they’re like, oh, yeah, well, I’m not doing any of that anymore. Like, I run in a completely different direction now.

Jimn Kyles 19:41
Yeah, gosh, that’s awesome. So today, this is the goal. Where are you lacking discipline? Where is it that I feel like I’m not inspired? And again, we’re not talking about the condition of your life currently. Because you may be in a tough spot. You may be in a hard season, we all face them. But the only thing that pulls us past our day of pain is a great vision yes, that God gives us and not something that is just manufactured or made from our own self. But a really God birthed vision. Yeah. So that vision needs to be clear that vision needs to be compelling. And their vision needs to be consistent. And when you do this, I’m telling you, life is going to be in a place where not only do you get unstuck, but you become unstoppable. Great. So I hope this has helped you, we’d love to hear from you. Send us an email, you can do that through the link in the description notes. Also, go buy a copy of the book, if you hadn’t purchased copy, we’d love for you to purchase one. We also have the audible version. Come on. So excited. Those of you that don’t want to read it. We got the audible version. We also have the ebook through Kindle. And we’d love to just hear from you. But if this podcast is touching you and it’s making a difference, and you’re enjoying the content, would you do a couple of things, it would mean the world to me and to Jolea. If number one you would subscribe to it. So it comes every week to wherever it is you consume the content, right. Second thing is we want you to

Jolea Garza 21:06
share it. Yeah, yeah. Share it with somebody that you believe is going to touch.

Jimn Kyles 21:10
Yeah, just I look one or two people right now. Hit the three dots at the top and click texted out right now and say, Hey, I think this might be for you. It was so good for me. The third thing is would you rate and review the podcast that your ratings and reviews always help us of course, if you’d give us a five star positive review. It’s huge. And allows us to get the word out and we just will continue our promises to bring you great content each and every week to help you get unstuck and to move your life forward. So I can’t wait to see you next week. Until then take one step forward. Bye bye

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