Today, I and Pastor Jolea will share with you the three questions that you can ask yourselves to assess if you are living a life of purpose. We will also discuss the four essential building blocks of life with the understanding that, if we focus and develop on these building blocks, nothing can cause us to stay stuck or be stranded.
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Hey, welcome to the unstuck and unstoppable podcast where we help you move your life forward. If you are living your life right now and you feel unfulfilled, maybe you’re just coasting through life you feel like you don’t have any real purpose. I want you to know you’re listening to the right episode of our podcast today. I’m your host Jimn Kyles. I’m here with Jolea Garza. Yes. What’s up, Joe-Joe?
Pastor Jolea 0:22
Second week, building blocks,
Jimn Kyles 0:24
building blocks of life essential
Pastor Jolea 0:26
building blocks. Yeah, that’s right. Yeah, this is gonna be great.
Jimn Kyles 0:28
We’re so excited. If you’re just joining us, today’s a great episode to join us. We are talking about living life with purpose. And in a day and age today, this is a message that I think resonates more than ever, I think the global pandemic all that we walked through think a lot of people are evaluating and reevaluating, hey, is my life fulfilled, because nobody wants to just go click a time clock or punch a clock, and there’s just something that I think is shifted to where people are like, I don’t want to wake up in my life. Yeah.
Pastor Jolea 1:00
I think there’s such a shift in culture. 100% I think there are more and more people. I think before it was okay. You know, people did what they needed to just to make sure that Yeah, that’s right. They were living in surviving. We’ve gotten out of a season of of wanting to live and survive, but to live fulfilled. But the question is, how do we live? Right? And so I’m super excited to
Jimn Kyles 1:22
unpack that today as well. So we’re so glad you’re joining us. It’s gonna be great. Hey, we do have someone that we want to give shout out to the reviews. Thank you. For those of you that are joining the community, you’re leaving us some reviews, you’re telling people about it. We’re just so grateful. We had a great review, we always like to share, you know some time, tell us tell us.
Pastor Jolea 1:43
I love this one big shout out to Judith Godfrey. And so just super excited. They said something so sweet. They said you are speaking life what a relevant podcast. In such times not only do people feel stuck. But the world feels stuck. That’s also like man, so true. She listed a bunch of different way reasons the world feels stuck between COVID and inflation and wars, the list never ends. Thank you for letting the world know that nobody needs to stay stuck. But that we can be unstuck and unstoppable love and appreciate you Pastor Jimn. Wow, that’s so good.
Jimn Kyles 2:15
Well, we’re so grateful. If you just if you’re enjoying this content, would you please rate us leave us a review. It helps us in the rankings. Continue to get the word out. Also, if you’re enjoying this, go to the website Jimnkyles.com. Yeah, we’ve got lots of great resources for you there. They’re absolutely free. You can also pre order a copy of my new book that comes out November Yeah, November 15, November 15. Super excited. So if you haven’t already done so go preorder a copy and be one of the first ones to get it when it’s released November 15. We’re actually working on the audible version in two weeks. And so I’m excited to record that and just continue bring great content, great resources, and the whole purpose and the desire of our heart is to help you get unstuck, but not just help you get unstuck. I mean, what our goal is, we want you to become unstoppable. Yes, not that life never has any problems. But I want to give you tools, we want to resource you. We want you to have a place where you can go when life throws curveballs, and you say, Look, I don’t know if I can go very far. But can I just go one step. And that’s really our whole theme. And motto is just take one step forward. And don’t allow anything to stop you from moving. That’s how you become unstoppable.
Pastor Jolea 3:26
Unstoppable is all about whatever life throws at you the ability to keep moving forwards,
Jimn Kyles 3:31
right? So we’re excited. I know this podcast is resonating. I looked at the stats the other day, over 10 countries have downloaded the podcast. And we’ve got 1000s of downloads and people are interacting in our Facebook community. And the reason I believe that when I was writing the book, what I found was that 80% of Americans feel stuck. Yep. And the I’m a pastor, so my heart was how do you help people? God, you’ve got the answer. God, how do you help me craft the message that has helped me stay unstuck and really become unstoppable? Not that I’ve never had moments where I felt stuck. But I didn’t stay stuck. Yeah, that’s great. And that’s really what the book we talk a lot about. So specifically, I think it’s chapter 6,7,8,9,10, 11, the four essential building blocks of life. And what we understand is that if we will focus and develop and work on the four essential building blocks of life, there’s really nothing that can cause you to stay stuck or be stranded. And the four essential building blocks is first identity. We talked about
Pastor Jolea 4:38
that last week. Yes. Go back and listen to that podcast. Go back. So yeah, so
Jimn Kyles 4:42
important. Yeah. 100%. And today, we’re talking about purpose. Yep. And the next one is vision. And then paradigms. Yeah. And really, when I began to start the book, I had a great editor working with me. I actually thought the whole book was going to be about paradigms. So we may spend multiple weeks even extra time on that because you You know, in the Christian faith and Christian world, and we hear a lot about identity and purpose and vision, but the one thing I didn’t hear a lot about was the subconscious pattern of thought, your paradigms. And I thought that’s what the book was going to be about. And even as we began to write in the first six months of the book, that was the predominant theme of the book, but I realized, that has no actual great impact in your life, if you don’t get the first three things, right, that’s great, which is I got to know who I am in Christ, not just who I am. Because you don’t find identity by just discovering who you are, you got to find the identity by who you are by the one who made you so good. So it’s identity in Christ. And then your purpose is what I’m supposed to be doing right now. It’s my assignment. And then the vision is, where am I supposed to be going? And then the paradigm is just the subconscious pattern of thought. It’s what will either get you there, or it will sabotage what you’re getting. Yeah. So I’m excited. We’ll go into all of that. Now, when we talk about purpose. Let’s dive in. We’ve got a few things that I want you to grab. The first one is, God created you for a purpose. Yeah, it’s that simple. That’s simple. Yeah. Jeremiah 1:5. I love this passage of Scripture. If you’re not a believer, it’s okay. I’m just gonna read this as a believer. This is the foundation of of our life and faith and what we operate through. But Jeremiah, it says, Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. This is God speaking to Jeremiah. Now he is talking to Jeremiah didn’t talk to Jimn or Jolea, or whoever else is listening. Kevin was up, Kevin, he’s running our camera. If you’re, we love pastor Kevin. Yeah. But but the point is still the same, the heartbeat, he’s saying, Look, I knew you before you were born, right? And it says, I set you apart, I appointed you as a prophet to the nation.
Pastor Jolea 6:46
I think that’s so good. I think it’s so good to know. And I don’t know if everybody knows that when you were created, like from before you were even thought that God had destiny and purpose for you,
Jimn Kyles 6:58
before your parents even knew you on your way. Yeah, God said, I knew Yes. And I set you apart. And so what that means is if God really knew me, before I was born, and he’s appointed me, as whatever it is that he’s created me to be, that there is a purpose in every season of my life that I’m supposed to fulfill. You know, I love what it says, I appointed you as a prophet to the nation’s Well, that’s later in his life. We know the story of Jeremiah as a believer, he’s a great prophet to the nations. But still, there was a purpose while he was a child, right as he was growing up and God has a purpose as a teenager, and what was his assignment or purpose as a young adult? And then finally, he fulfills his ultimate assignment, right? But we must realize that no matter what season you find yourself in, look, you have a purpose.
Pastor Jolea 7:46
Yeah. And I love that I love that we’re saying, you know, that we are, we’re really uncovering or discovering the purpose, because the purpose is already there. Yeah, you just have to find it. And I think that’s so important to know that it’s already on the inside of you. And so even with the book, it just helps you and the resources that we have, it just helps you uncover what is already on the inside. Absolutely.
Jimn Kyles 8:07
And I wanted to also say this, just because it’s your purpose for that season, doesn’t mean you’re going to love every minute, right? I mean, some purpose is painful.
That’s good. I
mean, it’s like something’s out there’s a rough. Wow, he’s trying to soften my rough edge.
Pastor Jolea 8:26
That’s, that’s really, really great. That’s really good.
Jimn Kyles 8:30
Well, I’m laughing because it’s been mostly painful. Trying to download
Pastor Jolea 8:34
that, but it’s, I love even in life we talked about is 100%, about you, and it’s 100% not about you, right, you know, and so the pain that you experience is so that you can pull other people past those points of pain as well, and say, I’ve been there. So maybe even a part of your purpose. Like for entrepreneurs, you’ve experienced both that high highs of entrepreneur and entrepreneurship, but then also the low lows, entrepreneurship. And so you can go and help and say, I’ve been there. I know, I know what you’re walking through, and I can help you come out of that as well. So
Jimn Kyles 9:07
well, isn’t that just, you know, cause I think somebody will say, Well, I don’t feel like it makes me come alive. But there were seasons where God said, You’re gonna do this because I’m working in you. And then what I found was in the season, that I didn’t naturally enjoy, and I didn’t naturally like and it wouldn’t naturally making me happy. I had to find my joy, not happiness, and joy comes in relationship with God. So God was teaching me that in the middle of the painful season, can you still have joy and do it because you love me, but
Pastor Jolea 9:39
that’s why these are building blocks because you you can go back when when your purpose doesn’t look the way you want it to. And when you’re in the middle of a season where completing or being a part of your purpose isn’t comfortable. You go back to identity. I know who I am, and I know who God has called me to be. And this is a part of the process for fulfilling the purpose that He He’s getting ready as well.
Jimn Kyles 10:01
Absolutely. And that’s why they’re building blocks. You got to do that identity first. So that when the purpose is painful, I still don’t lose who I am. Yes, but it reminds me and DL Moody had a great quote. And it’s one of my favorite quotes. I read this often it says, your greatest fear should not be fear of failure, but of succeeding at something that really doesn’t matter. Wow. So we’ve got to make sure that our ladder we talked about it, that the ladder is leaning against the right goal, the right vision, the right place that God has taken, and that I don’t end up at the end of my life saying, Man, I was successful, but it was at the wrong thing. And I’ve just so committed to that and saying, God, it’s not about just happiness and easy. It’s what’s my purpose right now? What am I supposed to be doing? What’s my god given assignment? And then don’t get distracted from that. Reminds me of a story of a guy named Matthew Emmons, you’ve heard me tell the story. Yeah, he was in the 2004 Olympics and Athens. This guy was on the American team. He was in the competition’s a three position, 15 meter rifle competition. And this guy was the best in the world, there was nobody that could hold a candle to him. He was brilliant. And in 2004, in the Olympics, he was actually so far ahead of his competition, that all he had to do when he was shooting the rifle was just put the bullet on the target anywhere, anywhere. It didn’t have to be a bullseye just anywhere. Wow. And he automatically would win the gold medal. And what makes these athletes so unique is that what they have is the ability to calm themselves in such a way they lower the respiration, their breathing, even the heartbeat and their pulse, their heart rate, they will pull the trigger between heartbeats. And it is so smooth. I mean, it’s fascinating. If you’ve ever watched how real talent and gifted these guys are, well, here he is. He’s in first place, and all he has to do is hit the target. And somehow he lines up the shot. He’s getting ready. And man, he’s he’s got his eye locked into that bull’s eye, and he slows his heart rate down. There’s no movement. I mean, he’s in perfect form. And he pulls the trigger and it goes bullseye. And instead of hearing cheering, the crowd gasps and you hear this guy, he hit a bullseye on the wrong target. Wow. So where he just had to hit the target. He got distracted, and was focused in on the wrong thing hits a bull’s eye and it goes from first place to eighth place. Yeah, no medal. Wow. And I wonder if even through COVID people out there listening to you listen to the pandemic, you were you were laser focused on your purpose, pre pandemic pre crisis, you know, and it’s like lasered in and then somehow it’s not that you’re not lasered in. But I wonder if we could just assess are we lasered in on the right target so great, because I don’t want you to get to the end of your life, and have the regret of Oh, my God, I realize I was focused on the wrong thing. I was not fulfilling my purpose, right.
Pastor Jolea 13:01
I just love that. I think that we are just so like I was saying earlier, we are in a culture where people are more interested in uncovering what their purpose is. But then it’s also important not to allow the world still by the world standard to define what the purpose is, right? It’s like you’re you’re not your purpose is not fulfilled by being just like every other influencer on Instagram, for example, purpose, you really have to uncover what your purpose is just like Hitting the Bullseye, we could all do the same thing. You know, and it’s great that people follow their passion. But is it? Is it your purpose? Its a big deal?
Jimn Kyles 13:35
That is exactly right. And you know, your purpose is your assignment. And what I would say, so it’s so important for you, if you’re really going to discover your God given purpose, to ask God, what is my assignment right now, and to know that my assignment is multifaceted, and it’s fluid. But let me just give it and I said it earlier, but it’s like as a student, your purpose is different than as a young adult. As a young adult, it’s different than a young married man or young married woman or a father who’s got a brand new family or a grandfather. So every season and every stage has different facets. And so it’s not like, you find a purpose and you’re locked in. It never changes. Yeah. So it’s constantly it’s a fluid. God, am I in the right position? Am I doing the right thing? And there’s got to be this real assessment, a constant assessment, right? And I think seasons can last, I typically have watched the rhythms of my life, my life is gone in four and eight year rhythms. It’s almost like every four years something shifts, something shifts. I mean, here’s a 10 year rhythm, you know, 10 years ago, we launched the church, right? And then 10 years later, I’m an author, right? That’s a rhythm. So it’s like, okay, boom. So I didn’t stop the church right now. I’m an author. I started podcasting. So we’re podcasters and authors. And so it’s a rhythm and it’s like God, sometimes he takes things away that you’re doing. And then sometimes he adds to
Pastor Jolea 15:02
Yeah, I think it’s so important the flexibility you said earlier this week, don’t let your your boundaries become barriers. And so being open to when your purpose changes, so I think of a season in my life where I was leading and really enjoying leading young adults. And so here at the church, and that was in my early 20s, and I was having so much fun. And then my husband walked on the scene, and we get engaged. Yeah, and I had, I did have to wrestle, because my purpose, my purpose for a couple years was leading young adults and being a part of a season with other young single people. And then I had to let go of that season and walk into a new purpose, which was growing as a spouse and learning how to be a wife and learning how, and so it was just two different seasons. And so understanding what your assignment is in those differences is so important.
Jimn Kyles 15:54
Well, so I would say it like this to live a life of purpose is to live life fulfilling God’s assignment in every season of your life. Don’t leave anything on the table, that’s good. It’s like God, this is my season, I’m constantly evaluating. And I’m constantly which we’re going to give you which will always give us practical tools, I’m gonna give you three questions to ask. And excited, we also have a free resource that you can go to Jimnkyles.com. and download it, and it’s, it’s a worksheet that’s gonna help you just really think through this and evaluate, because that’s what we want to do. We’re glad you’re listening to it. And we’re glad you’re watching it. But we also want you to work through it. Yes, it’s actually take the step, yes. Gotta work through it. Because otherwise, it’s just knowledge that’s not applied is worthless. It’s applied knowledge. And, and this is what we talked about that it takes work, if you’ve, the pain of where you’re at, has to be greater than the pain to get where you want to be, for you to begin to move. And sometimes they’re like, well, it’s not that bad. I’m halfway for fun. No, no, you just got to determine Am I, Am I fulfilled. Am I really experiencing all that God has for me, and then it’s like, I want all that God has. So here’s three questions that we’re going to ask ourselves to see, am I living a life of purpose? Am I living in the right space at the right place? At the right pace? For my life? The first one is what am I doing right now that I should stop doing?
Jolea Garza 17:19
I love it. Yeah. That’s one of my favorite. Look at your entire life and stop doing some things.
Jimn Kyles 17:25
Just say no, yes.
Pastor Jolea 17:29
It’s easier, it is easier to say no one, the more you know who you are, and who God created you to be and then two the more you ask God, God, what have you asked me to do in this season, and then just start to, to move things out?
Jimn Kyles 17:41
Well, and I think this is where identity builds the path for purpose. Because when you know who you are, you know who you’re not so good. When I know who I am, I can stay in my lane. And I think what we don’t do is if you don’t know who you are, and you’re struggling with your purpose, you’ll find your identity and your purpose through what other people want to put on you. And here’s how I talk a lot about this in the book. I talk I’ve got a whole section about in the book is carrying the right weight. Because when you don’t have your identity, and you don’t know your purpose, what you’ll do is you’ll allow the world and people around you to overload you. Yeah. And that’s what happens. Now you’re carrying more weight than you were designed to carry or intended to carry. Yeah. And you end up on the side of life, right? Just broken down on the on the highway of life. And so I want to encourage you to really take a moment and just evaluate all the things that you’re that you’re doing. Like, hey, if you’ve ever done an assessment of, okay, you know, we’re doing soccer, okay, I’m a soccer dad, because I coach soccer, you know, I’m a husband, and I can’t take that away, doing my chores, all the things that I’ve got, I’ve got all my assignments. Yeah, honey dues. And so So you look at every and then even more than just your task. What are my responsibilities? What are my reoccuring schedule schedules? Yeah, evaluation. And then you’ll start to notice, well, man, I think, in fact, we had a meeting last night that I said no to, because it was outside of where I needed to be. And normally, even as a pastor, I can feel like man, I gotta be there. I gotta be there. But it’s not enough to be there. I’ve got to say no, because you
Pastor Jolea 19:20
know what? Your assignment. That is not my assignment. It doesn’t if it doesn’t fit in your assignment, then it’s easy to say no. When you know what?
Jimn Kyles 19:26
It’s easier. I still vacillated. And I but I’m like, no, no, I’m not gonna get pulled out of where I’m supposed to be. And so what do I what I need to stop doing that I’m doing right now. Here’s the second question. What am I not doing that I should start doing that? Yep. What am I not doing that? So what is it that I need to start doing? You know, where do I maybe you need to start volunteering to serve at your church. That’s great. You know, it’s like, Man, I feel like I know I should but I haven’t. Well, once you say no to everything you’re not supposed to do now I’ve gotten margin. Yeah. And it’s like, okay, well, I should as a disciple as a follower of Jesus, even though I’m a career man or a career woman, and I’ve got a young family, and I’m doing well in that aspect as a disciple, I need to be a contributor. Yeah,
Pastor Jolea 20:13
you can make space when you when you when you stop doing certain things. Now, now you have space. Yes, like now, what do I add? So just Stopping, stopping everything is not the solution, it is not only stopping, but then adding in the right.
Jimn Kyles 20:26
Things. Yeah. And then you’ll, you’ll prayerfully, add in the right things, you’ll, you’ll really consider it and then you get the advice of your spouse and those that are around you that love you, those that are helping to lead you but but I just want to encourage you, many times we say no to God things because we’re busy with good things. And so as we say no to just all the good things. Remember, you’re trying to discover God’s purpose for your life, which here’s the cool thing about it. God created you for the purpose. So he creates you for a purpose. And then he gives you fulfillment in doing that purpose. You know, I love Ephesians chapter two, verse 10, says, For we are God’s work are God’s handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. So he’s got an assignment for you. But I love it he created at the core of who you are, when you fulfill the assignment, even if it’s a painful assignment, or a hard seat. Yeah, you feel fulfilled? Yeah, you feel like you’re come alive. And that’s where living with purpose will change you as a person, not because it’s easier, but because you come alive on the inside.
Pastor Jolea 21:34
I think for me, this was a big deal, you know, uncovering my purpose. And and also understanding that it was multifaceted. In my personal life, I am an Enneagram, three through and through. And so I love working hard, like I could just, but I had to recognize that working hard isn’t my only purpose. I am a wife, I’m a mom. And so I’ve done this evaluation where it’s like, what do I need to stop doing? And so there was a season where I was I would work and be in the office from the sun up to sundown. And so as I began to reevaluate my schedule, and I really started to ask, What’s my purpose here at my job? What are the things that I absolutely need to do in order to fulfill that, then I was able to remove specifically some of the evening commitments that I had. And then what I added was family dinners. So now, four out of five days of the week, I am sitting at the table with my children and my husband, and eating dinner and connecting and asking questions, because that’s a part of my assignment and my purpose in this, you say
Jimn Kyles 22:35
such a great point. And I’m glad you pulled that out. Because you have purpose at work. You have purpose in church, you have purpose as a family, you have purpose in your marriage. So every facet, there ought to be like, here’s our purpose, here’s what we do. And that’s what keeps you centered. It’s like, okay, in this season, and there are rhythms, you know, in this season, we have dinner five nights a week, okay, well, the rhythm as they get older, may change, okay, we’re gonna have, what’s the purpose connecting, right? How we connect,
Pastor Jolea 23:05
then it goes to three nights a week, and I’m that maybe there’s a season where you go back to school, or maybe there’s a season where you, you know, are launching a business. And so I love you, you have an example. You’re like, hey, when I was in a push season, in my job as you stack your family townies that, hey, I’m gonna be gone a little bit more.
We’re building this build. Yeah, I said, I got six months. Yeah. And here’s, it’s going to change for six months, which means we’re not going to do a lot of this, but we’re going to make it up on these trips. Right. And so but because the purpose was to connect as a family, we connect. So so good. Well, and then the last thing that the question that you got to ask is, why not do it today? Yeah, you just need to list out Why would not do it today. And I think what that does is identify not I think I know what it does, it identifies any excuses that we tell ourselves, Well, I can’t because I did …. And what you’re going to find is they’re not that many of them are not valid reasons. They’re excuses. And if it is a valid reason, then create a plan of how to overcome that valid reason. Yeah, all right. Okay. Yeah, plan two months, we’re gonna, I can’t because of this commandment, but I’m going to resign from that commitment. Here’s the plan. So it just allows you to transition, healthy transition 100 percent, and when you answer these questions, again, go download the worksheet, we’re going to help you also I want to encourage you in the beginning in the spring of 2023, we’re going to do our first one day event and we’re going to do an Unstuck and Unstoppable One Day I am so excited about that. So if this is something where you’re like I’ve downloaded the worksheet and I need more help, we’re gonna do a one day event we’re gonna come and help you get unstuck and we’re gonna focus on the four areas Yeah, identity, that you’ll have an identity statement, your purpose, what am I supposed to be focusing on? Your vision? Where are we going and then paradigms? What is it that sabotaging my life right now? And so just know that we are here to help you and I’m excited about that. Well, we’ve come to the end of our time today. Yeah,
it’s time to take some steps steps. Yep. Yeah, yeah. So there are a few things that we want you to do. The first thing that we ask that you do is subscribe. Subscribe, subscribe, wherever you listen to this podcast. That way you get notified when we drop a new podcast every Tuesday morning automatically
Jimn Kyles 25:16
comes to you. Listen, we’re asking you to go out and teach it. Make sure you teach one thing that you learned today to somebody, the best way to learn something is to teach it.
Pastor Jolea 25:24
engage with us on social media, we have Instagram, Facebook, we even have a Facebook community that is free to you. We’d love for you to join that unstuck and unstoppable Facebook community. Post about what you’ve learned post about things that you’d like to share, or any aha moments that you’re having.
Jimn Kyles 25:40
Another step we’d like you to take is would you just post a review? Wherever you consume the content, it just again helps us in the rankings helps people say oh, it’s a podcast worth listening to. It mean the world to myself and I know that Joloea and then last share this podcast, would you just pull out your phone right now and just say I’m going to share it with one person. Maybe you post it on social media. We’d love to continue to help not only you but those that you love to get unstuck and become unstoppable. Yep. Well, we can’t wait to see you next week. Until then, bye bye.